A Mother’s Day Without My Mom

I walked into a store a few weeks ago and there was a large Hallmark sign reminding me that Mother’s Day is May 8th.  I won’t lie, it caught me off guard, with a hiccup in my chest kinda way.   I’m finding it a tad odd to have the upcoming holiday in view without a mother to celebrate.  Yes, I can still celebrate her but she isn’t here for me to buy that Hallmark card for or hug.

Last year on May 9th I wrote a post called A Mother’s Strength – Tribute to my Mom.  I have never been so happy that I wrote a piece.  She passed away on August 26th last year and I’m glad she was able to read it.  I’m grateful I have a screenshot of her response from where I shared it on Facebook too.

My mother and I didn’t always see eye to eye and we had quite different personalities.  She was my mother and I loved her, I still do today.

Until a person experiences a parent passing away, one can not really relate. For example my husband’s parents are both still living.  We see them almost daily and from my own loss it has brought a more sensitive view.   I find myself  with a mindset of cherishing them more and anticipating the future my husband (and others) will ultimately experience.  My heart aches for my spouse when the time comes, which I’m hoping is a great long while away.

My strength has not been as great as my mother’s seemed to be, especially in the past few months.  When I feel weak I think of her, when I smell lilacs I think of her, when I see an old photo or embroider a towel I think of her.  And yes, sometimes in the middle of a store I think of her.  This will continue for the rest of my life I’m sure.

Whether you have a great relationship, so-so relationship, difficult relationship with your mother take the time this Mother’s day, or any day of the year, to let her know at least one thing you are thankful for regarding her parenting.  This particular post says it well I think and it’s worth the time to read.

Grace is a gift,

Julie